One in four Women

By: Jourdan Cable

Colleen* could not wait for her first night out as a college student at High Point University. Her roommate asked if she would like to go to a fraternity party with her, and of course, Colleen accepted the invitation.

Colleen remembers the outfit she wore to the party; a white denim skirt and a navy blue tank top.

She remembers the music that was playing when she walked into the fraternity house; “Stronger” by Kayne West.

She remembers losing her roommate at the party, and a boy handing her a drink.

She looked around and saw everyone drinking the same red drink out of the same red cups, so remembers drinking, because everyone else was.

The next thing Colleen remembers is waking up, face down in her dorm, still wearing the white jean skirt and navy blue tank top from the night before. She frantically turned to her roommate and together, they tried to piece together the rest of Colleen’s night.

“I still don’t know what could have happened to me,” says Colleen.
Colleen and her roommate concluded that her drink was unlike everyone else’s at the party. The stranger drugged the drink that he gave her.

“All I know is that I’m very lucky my roommate took me back to my dorm instead of anyone else,” says Colleen. She rubs her arms to try to make the goosebumps that have grown on her arms from telling the story go away.

“I still get the chills thinking about what could have happened," she says.

Unfortunately, not everyone is as lucky as Colleen. According to the Annunal Review of Public Health, More than 97,000 students between the ages of 18 and 24 are victims of alcohol-related sexual assault or date rape, and HPU is not an exception.



Samantha’s Story

It was December of Samantha’s* freshman year at High Point University. Her boyfriend recently broke up with her, so her friends took her to a party to cheer her up.

Samantha said she consumed six to seven vodka cranberry drinks in less than two hours of being at the party.

“I’m way too tiny to drink that much. I know that now, but at the time, I was so upset, I didn’t care about what I was doing,” said Samantha.

Samantha saw a boy who liked her at the party, and they began to talk. During the conversations, Samantha said he invited her back to his room to watch a movie, and she agreed to go back to his room.

“Normally, I would have never done that,” Samantha said. “I clearly wasn’t in the right state of mind.”

Samantha vaguely remembers him putting a movie on. She remembers watching, but shortly after the movie started, he began kissing her.

“I didn’t know what to do, so I just went along with it,” she said.

Next, Samantha says he got up and went to his dresser. Samantha remembers being confused to why he got up.

“He came back with a condom, put it on, and began to have sex with me,” Samantha said. “He didn’t even ask, I didn’t know what to do. I asked him to stop, but he didn’t.”

After asking many times for him to stop, it was over.
Samantha frantically ran to her room and cried all night.

“When I got back to my room, I was thinking straight. I couldn’t sleep I was crying so hard,” she said. “The only thing that was good about my situation is that he had used a condom.”

In most circumstances, victims who consume alcohol and have sex do not know whether a condom was used or not.

In fact, according to Mothers Against Drunk Driving, or MADD, 400,000 have unprotected sex and more than 100,000 report having been too intoxicated to know if they consented to having sex.

Samantha was mortified after that night; she did not tell anyone what had happened.

She considered herself a “walking zombie” with black bags under her eyes and a hollowed out face from not eating.

“I went to class, did my work, and went to sleep,” she said.

Samantha said it didn’t take long for her friends to realize something was wrong.

Eventually, Samantha told her friend what happened.

She said her friend so outraged, she threw a picture frame and it broke into hundreds of pieces.

Her friend tried to get her help, but Samantha refused saying she was too embarrassed.

Unlike Samantha, who was hesitant to tell other people her story, Colleen was willing to let people know what happened to her.


Standing up for yourself

“Just because you are on campus, does not mean you are safe,” said Molly Casebere, a Counselor at High Point University.

“Don’t walk alone, be with your friends and use the buddy system. And always make sure you have a cell phone on you,” said Casebere.

Colleen looks back on her first night of college and thinks about everything she did wrong.

First, Colleen recognizes that she lost the only person that she knew at the party.

“I wandered off alone. I was an easy target for the person who gave me my drink,” she said.

Colleen also recognizes that she took an open drink from someone that she did not know.

“That’s the stupidest thing I did,” she said. “I’m just thankful that I somehow made it back to my room. I count my blessings every day.”

Casebere, acknowledges how difficult situations involving rape can be.

“Everyone copes differently,” Casebere said. “Some people want to pretend it didn’t happen and move on. Well, good luck.”

Casebere said the best way to get over a situation is to talk about what happened.

Colleen says she is able to look back and acknowledge that she was too naïve at the time.

“All I could think about was that I was so cool because I was in college. I didn’t realize that people would do this to me. I still don’t understand how someone could do this,” Colleen said.

Colleen lectures to high school seniors about the dangers of alcohol. She also gives them advice so they do not have to experience what happened to her.


Moving On

Colleen, now a college junior, looks around her room filled of collages from her first two-and-a-half years at High Point University.

Her smile is soft and full of kindness. While discussing all of the memories, her voice gets higher and her eyes get wider as if she were a child at Walt Disney World for the first time.

But then, the fear of what could have happened is penetrates through her smile and her eyes grow dark and heavy. Her shoulders look as though they are being weighted down by 50 pound weights.

“After the incident, I thought about transferring,” Colleen said. “I wanted to get away from this, until I realized that colleges everywhere are not safe.”

Colleen took the initiative to help educate incoming college girls to avoid making the same mistake she did.

“I wouldn’t wish what happened to me on anyone else,” Colleen said. “I’m doing everything in my power to prevent it.”

*Indicates name has been changed